Sometimes you see a new product so brilliant, so innovative that you wonder why you didn’t think of it yourself. Some of these products are so innovative and so impactful that if taken to their natural conclusion would require the government to step in with some sort of regulatory regime.
It reminds of joke that the comedian Webster told in one of his TV specials in the 1980s. He suggested that in order to fend off the communist threat all the USA needed to do was an ‘ICBMW’. An ICBMW a fusion of an ‘Intercontinental Ballistic Missile’ with a ‘BMW’ car. He figures that will millions of these circulating around the US and Europe the Soviets wouldn’t know what to do.
Reports out of Vancouver a few nights ago had an unauthorized private drone flying around apartment towers in the downtown core. Someone actually caught the episode on tape. I am not sure about you- but when I heard a few months back that Amazon was looking at delivering their goods using drones – all I could think about is some of the ‘packages’ being delivered by the US military to some of the Islamic terrorists around the world.
“Special delivery Mr. Pratt”
“Great …could you drop it in the backyard while I get the family into our bomb shelter”
But that’s not the reason for this blog (I know its a long pre-amble!)..
It was actually a commercial I saw on CNN the other day for a new product called ‘Pet Commander’. Apparently, with Pet Commander you can make your pet (probably a dog as cats and fish seem to be somewhat well behaved ) submit by pressing a button on a small hand-held device that will emit a high pitched electronic pulse.
https://www.buypetcommand.com/
Last night I heard at our family party of a situation where it was being used by people without pets to subdue other pets in the neighbourhood. For those who aren’t pet lovers and don’t want a dog begging for food at the table, jumping on their lap or mating with one of their legs……this is a godsend. But I am not sure that is what the Pet Commander people were thinking it would be used for. Picture this..
Lovely dinner laid out on the table for 12 guests and a slobbering St. Bernard enters the room to the lovely sighs of their owners –only to see 7 of the guests bring out the ‘zapper’ and nail him. Besides being a favorite of the RCMP at the Vancouver airport this whole product could be very problematic.
Just thing of the line extensions..
“Are you tired of that muscle- bound tattoo dude at the park, with the spikey hair and Doc Martens, letting his Pit-Bull run free. Just try ‘Pet- Owner’ Commander. In no time you will have him trying to find a little Bichon-Frise walking around the neighforhood looking like he is escorting a ball of cotton-batten”
“Husband won’t help with the meal prep, dishes or laundry? Just try ‘Hus-Commander’. With repeated zaps, in no time you can have your laconic ‘tub of lard’ on the floor scrubbing the linoleum like Mr. Clean –keep the pressure on and he is likely to run to the flower shop to get you a bouquet, also some chocolates – returning to the house with a commitment to talk about your relationship through the entire first season of Grey’s anatomy”
“From K-Tel international comes ‘Wifey-Commander’ — after dinner you are sitting in your comfy chair watching ‘the big’ game on TV while your wife washes the dishes . As you are surfing the channels your wife comes in to ask you for help ….and you just hit her with a zap from your combo ‘wifey-commander – channel changer’ and she leaves the room to get you a beer and returns to ask you the score”
“Operators are standing by……..and will deliver the Commander of your choice through the services the new and improved Cheney Drone – your kid’s won’t hear a thing. Void where prohibited…which may be everywhere”
pucksense 